Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! I haven’t posted in about two months, and I knew I could not let the first month of the year pass without posting something.

I’ve been going through a period of writer’s block and feeling like I just don’t have anything to offer, anything to say, anything to add- to anything. There comes a time when you wonder whether whatever it is you’ve chosen to go after, whatever that thing is that you love- you wonder if it’s really the right thing for you to do. You wonder if you have what it takes. I know this is normal, but it stinks.

Someone once told me, or maybe I heard it in a sermon, that we must move from desire (I want to be a writer! I’m going to be a lawyer! I’m called to paint!) to discipline (work at it regularly, do it when you don’t feel like it) before we can truly delight in what God has given us to do. I feel pretty stuck in the discipline stage, so here I am, encouraging myself and you, my wonderful readers, to just do it, even if it doesn’t turn out exactly how we want it to at first.

I promised myself in November that I would work on my writing every day, even if only for 10 or 15 minutes, but whenever I would think about doing it, I would get this overwhelming feeling of… well… being overwhelmed. It was like looking up at a tall mountain and getting depressed by the scope of it. All those negative emotions welling up.

I did receive a little encouragement the other day, though. I started submitting my poems to a few literary journals a few months ago, and I’d received 5 out of 7 possible rejections. On Sunday I got another BUT this one said: “There is much to admire in this submission and the poems made it through the first two rounds of reading.” Squeal!!! Thank you, Lord! Can’t give up now, got a lot more rejections to receive, because that is all part of this journey…

Yesterday I read this in 2nd Timothy: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline” (1:7 New Living Translation). One of my absolute favorite verses in the Bible. God gives us the spirit of power- boldness to step out and do what He has called us to do, no matter how hard it seems or how inadequate we feel. And love is the foundation and the goal and the point of everything: loving God, others, and ourselves. And then self-discipline, the ability to train ourselves to be our best.

I’d love to hear about what dreams and goals you are pursuing in this new year! Send me a comment.